The Brain Drainers or Malice In Wonderland
The Brain Drainers or Malice in Wonderland is the second segment of the Goof Gas Attack arc of The Bullwinkle Show. Plot Summary The episode begins with a re-cap of the previous episode that a mysterious malady is draining America's scientists of their brain power, along with the ace investigators called on to solve the problem. In desperation the government has turned to Bullwinkle, who says "They figured I had nothing to lose." However, the episode then picks up where the last one left off as someone has just lobbed a live hand grenade at our heroes. Bullwinkle picks up the grenade, mistaking it for a pineapple. Rocky, recognizing the danger, implores Bullwinkle to throw it away. Bullwinkle does so, quipping that it isn't even ripe. The two head into their house to prepare for their trip to Washington, but unbeknownst to them, Bullwinkle has thrown the grenade right back at the mysterious figure, who turns out to be Boris Badenov, who is blown up into a tree. Natasha suddenly appears and chides Boris for getting blown up by his own grenade again. Boris, undeterred, claims that Bullwinkle will never reach Washington, because he intends to use "Stragedy" on him. He sets up a shotgun next to the door, fastening a rope to its trigger, stretching it across the door of the house and tying the other end to a nail in the wall, hoping it will fire and blow Bullwinkle away when he comes out the door. However, Boris again falls into his own trap, as Bullwinkle trips and falls over the rope, causing the shotgun to fire over his head and hit Boris offscreen. Later, Rocky and Bullwinkle are on a train headed for Washington. Rocky is worried about the recent attempts on Bullwinkle's life, though Bullwinkle thinks Rocky is talking about the ratings on The Bullwinkle Show and re-assures Rocky they will be renewed for another season. Once Bullwinkle catches on to what Rocky is talking about, he is unconcerned, as the killer has already missed twice, though Rocky is still worried. Meanwhile, up ahead of the train, Boris approaches the tracks with a crowbar, attempting to pry up one of the rails and de-rail the train. Natasha thinks this might be a little heavy-handed, but Boris retorts, "You can't make an omelette without breaking eggs, poopsie!" However, Boris fails to realize the railroad is electric, and after failing to lift one of the rails, he tries the third rail, which immediately electrocutes him. Bullwinkle notices him as they pass, but Rocky, who is trying to sleep, dismisses it. The two continue their journey without incident, while Natasha chides Boris for failing three times in one episode (a new course record, or so Boris claims). Later, the train stops in McKeesport, PA which Bullwinkle initially thinks is Washington, but then plays it off as "I know, I'm just practicin'." Rocky is relieved that the trip will be over soon, but just then, a mysterious black airplane passes overhead and suddenly noses down and plunges directly at their railroad car. The narrator begins asking questions to set up the cliffhanger for the next episode, but takes too long, causing Bullwinkle to yell that at the rate he's going, it'll crash into their car before the episode ends. The narrator then speedily ends the episode, giving the titles "The Deadheads" or "Feeling Zero" for next time. Memorable Quotes Bullwinkle picks up the live hand grenade that has just fallen at his feet Bullwinkle: Well, I'll be doggy! It's a pineapple. Rocky: Throw it away, Bullwinkle! Bullwinkle: Might as well. It isn't even ripe. Hard as a rock. Bullwinkle throws the grenade, causing a huge explosion offscreen. Bullwinkle: WOW! Maybe it was riper than I thought... = Boris: Moose will never reach Vashington, Natasha! I'm going to use "stragedy" on him! Natasha: You mean, "strategy" darling. Boris: No, "stragedy"! I'm going to stretch the rope across the door and fasten the end to trigger on the shotgun, and when moose comes out the door, what is it? Boris and Natasha: Is "tragedy"! Boris: You said it! = Boris has just flashed past the train window, while being electrocuted by the train tracks. Bullwinkle: Hey, Rocky! Rocky (half asleep): Hmm? Bullwinkle: A feller just went by who was all lit up! Rocky: We must be next to the club car... Bullwinkle: Oh.